In my opinion, you aren't a very good friend if you KNOW your friend's SO is cheating and you say NOTHING while they remain oblivious. They might marry this loser and you could have said SOMETHING. Would it have stopped them? Maybe. Maybe not. But, they would know what they were getting. As for the cheapskate thing... I bet she already knew that.
I remember my best friend had a boyfriend that was "questionable" but I didn't have any proof or evidence that he had ever done anything he shouldn't of so I kept certain opinions I had about him to myself. When my friend started to realize that maybe he wasn't right for her, I was there to support her and then tell her my views. She really appreciated that I gave her the chance to find out for herself instead of forcing my views on her from the beginning.
That being said if I knew he cheated on her or really straight out treated her badly, I would immediately have told her. That's the line for me I guess.
I'm a "let me down" easy kind of person. I'd appreciate tact and I always try for tact. Sometimes leaving things unsaid that might hurt others is the best approach. If the guy's a sleaze, that will come out soon enough. Enjoying your theme this year, Joy.
A combination of tactful and forthright. I think men and women have different views on this scenario, since my hubby and I don't agree. Personally, if one of my good friends had a husband/boyfriend who I found out was messing around, I'd tell her, in a nice and supportive way. I'd want someone to tell me, and would feel a sort of betrayed if they didn't.
Hubby's view is it wouldn't be any of his (or my) business and he'd stay out of it.
In my opinion, you aren't a very good friend if you KNOW your friend's SO is cheating and you say NOTHING while they remain oblivious. They might marry this loser and you could have said SOMETHING. Would it have stopped them? Maybe. Maybe not. But, they would know what they were getting. As for the cheapskate thing... I bet she already knew that.
ReplyDeleteTact is better, but just tell me anyway.
ReplyDeleteYup, most of us would want to know.
ReplyDeleteI remember my best friend had a boyfriend that was "questionable" but I didn't have any proof or evidence that he had ever done anything he shouldn't of so I kept certain opinions I had about him to myself. When my friend started to realize that maybe he wasn't right for her, I was there to support her and then tell her my views. She really appreciated that I gave her the chance to find out for herself instead of forcing my views on her from the beginning.
ReplyDeleteThat being said if I knew he cheated on her or really straight out treated her badly, I would immediately have told her. That's the line for me I guess.
Tact, I'd say. Friends know when to push and when to comfort
ReplyDeleteI'm a "let me down" easy kind of person. I'd appreciate tact and I always try for tact. Sometimes leaving things unsaid that might hurt others is the best approach. If the guy's a sleaze, that will come out soon enough. Enjoying your theme this year, Joy.
ReplyDeleteI'd need it with tact. And a tissue.
ReplyDeleteIt depends but with a cheater or questionable person in my life I'll take tact so I can throw them out any day.
ReplyDeleteA combination of tactful and forthright. I think men and women have different views on this scenario, since my hubby and I don't agree. Personally, if one of my good friends had a husband/boyfriend who I found out was messing around, I'd tell her, in a nice and supportive way. I'd want someone to tell me, and would feel a sort of betrayed if they didn't.
ReplyDeleteHubby's view is it wouldn't be any of his (or my) business and he'd stay out of it.
I like the cartoons, by the way. :)
Hello,
ReplyDeleteHere from the A-Z this time :) No diplomacy required between friends, but gentleness would be good.
Best wishes,
Nilanjana.
Madly-in-Verse
Depends how close they are and what their motive is.
ReplyDeleteTact! As gently as possible.
ReplyDeleteMy friends usually tell me how it is in a way that makes me smile and laugh.
ReplyDeleteFunny. Things get lost when tact is involved. A good friend should give it to me straight.
ReplyDeleteWe may not like 'blunt' but at least it's easy to understand!
ReplyDeleteI prefer tact and saying things gently. The other way can be harsh and a turnoff.
ReplyDeleteI prefer the diplomatic approach...often they don't really want to hear the truth.
ReplyDeleteDonna B. McNicol
A to Z Participant